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For long time it has been hard to play battlefield heroes with a Penguin look in the face, but after some magazines of bullets my mom said "Hey you little idiot, start playing a proper game or I will pick up your balls and throw them in the food-processor together with your mouse and dignity".
This statement scared the shit out of the little boy's ass. He ran away to seek out if bad company 2 really was the greatest game ever, but he discovered that his mom smoked a joint. He totally freaked out. He told her he was impressed by the huge joint she made, but he also gave her a M16 to shoot her little hairy beaver in the face.
With make-up on she ran to the nearest sexclub and showed her boobs to all and was giving little smelly queefs in front of all those dirty horny old guys. The Guys clapped in their hands to show their respect to the huge boobies and tight asses from the early morning push-ups and sit-ups. Old-Guys wanted to drink a beer, because a beer makes them very trigger happy and motivated to kill the atmosphere inside dirty smelly underwear which tends to smell a lot when it is re- decorated with brown (and yellow).
After the show 'girls gone wild' The OldGuys went out to another strip club but this time it was too late and the girls were very tired and decided to steal a car in hope that they could sell whats left of it after racing through the city. But women driving is a bad-idea and the OldGuys put C-4 on to make everyone explode to death. There were parts all over the place and the CSI came to Odda City. There seemed to be a problem with the GPS signal so they couldn't find the shithole where santa-claus lives. They also couldn't know that where Champ and Kimmen went to get some wild tigers, there was many problems with the cages for the computer and throw 3 crates beer to every OG-member.
So the tigers drunk the beers that were poisoned and ended up in horrible pain which only MI-six can end by his beloved shotty. He put the keys of the tank in the hands of a national gunner who fail to start the engine, but did succeed in finding the key-hole of the secret suicide switch that was only missing a crucial part that was needed to detonate the smelly bombs behind he tank and also the special, no super special high-explosive dildo rockets. After a while a submarine came close to eliminate all penguins on Isla Innocentes but then came Johnny but he fell and HelloKitty laughed so hard that zeppis had to give mouth-to-mouth to his smiley face but after that HelloKitty got pissed and he shot him with Carl-Gustav. Hellokitty realized that what he just did was totally awesome because boy-on-boy action excites him totally. If he can be the big Ron Jeremy as he always wanted to so he applied together with F-son to a Swedish gay gamers community and they will game Medal of honor and sleep together with dead pinguins. There they will make high-quality in-game-porn with Vercetti productions and JohnnyPara's sextoys in MyLilPwny's bedroom. MyLilPwny will participate killing all gays while having fantasies about dropping the soap and getting raped by 10 black-guys in the shower and being gagged with a jerk-off-sock. He likes this, Ohyes he does!